Today is the 8-day anniversary of my iPhone, and in those eight days a whole bunch of people have asked if I've lost weight. At first I thought it was just that the iPhone made me look thinner — you know, like a good pair of jeans. But this morning I stepped on the scale and sure enough, I've lost four pounds.

I've done a retrospective analysis of the past 8 days of my life, and I think all four pounds can be directly attributable to significant iPhone-related lifestyle changes:

More time spent surfing while standing up with iPhone, rather than seated with Macbook Pro .1
Walked to two meetings I previously would have driven to, because I can leave my Macbook at the office and can walk further when I'm not carrying it .5
Took kids for a long stroller ride while chatting on my Bluetooth headset .25
Elimination of snacking while waiting for Treo to S-L-O-W-L-Y load a web page .5
Skipped dinner because I got into bed with my daughter and my iPhone and couldn't tear myself away from the iPhone even after my daughter fell asleep .25
Walked to the bus after a meeting (rather than bringing the car) because I was able to have a walking-meeting-by-iPhone rather than rushing back to the office .25
Found a healthy recipe for dinner on Epicurious rather than ordering Thai food .25
Used iPhone during drive to work to access bank account, pay Visa card so there'd be money for groceries, rather than foraging for whatever (inevitably) higher-cal food happened to be in the cupboards when we got home .75
Avoided scheduling a meeting during my workout time because I was able to review an accurate current schedule on my iPhone .25
Overall reduction in anxiety-related snacking due to increased sense of well-being from iPhone-y goodness .75
TOTAL WEIGHT LOSS 4 lbs

When you compare the up-front cost of an iPhone the cost and performance of other weight loss programs, four pounds in a little over a week looks like a pretty good deal:

  • If you sign up for Jenny Craig, you'll pay $77 to $119 per week (not including food) to lose 1-2 pounds a week; if it takes you seven weeks to lose 10 pounds, that translates into about $585 (compared to just $499 for a 16 GB iPhone, which at the current rate, will have me down by 10 pounds in just 2.5 weeks).
  • NutriSystem charges $293 per month (including food), and you can figure on losing ten pounds in four to ten weeks — so figure it may cost as much as $732 to lose the weight an iPhone can take off in just four weeks.
  • People lose weight faster on the Zone — something like 8 to 10 pounds a month — but it costs $40 per day; you could buy two iPhones for that money — with Bluetooth headsets!! — and lose weight with a friend.

Coming soon, the latest Apple campaign: iSkinny.